I Didn't Say It........

Christina Aguilera, on her Superbowl/National Anthem flub:

"I took in the moment a little bit too much. Shoot me for appreciating the moment but here I am at the Super Bowl...singing for a team and in front of the world. And remembering what it was like to be that young and look where I made it now. {but] that night I knew, I just made myself a Trivial Pursuit question...In 2011 what female singer, ya know, flubbed the lyrics. It's just insane. But I have a really good laugh about it and you get over things. You get back up again and you just prove to yourself and to everyone you're that much stronger."

This makes me wonder if she's talking about the 'flub,' or her ALLEGED new fondness for the drink. I mean, I loves me some Christina, but she's looking a little vodka-bloated lately.

Kara DioGuardi, on quitting, or being fired from, 'American Idol':

"I called them after I saw reports about the show and they said now that Ellen is leaving it's put everything up in the air because now we need to replace two people so we don't know what's going on. So I asked if I was fired and they said "no," so I said well last week we were talking about auditions, am I definitely doing the show? And they said, "We can't say that for sure but you're definitely not fired." I thought I'm not going to hang around and wait to see what happens, so I sent them a letter asking them to release me from their contract which they would not do until they sorted it all out. I think the reality is that the panel was not set up until the very end."

Um, Kara, when you ask someone if you are working, and they respond with a "We can't say that for sure...." Honey, you're fired. M'kay?

Rachel Maddow, on coming out, especially for people in the news business:

"I'm sure other people in the business have considered reasons why they're doing what they're doing, but I do think that if you're gay you have a responsibility to come out."

I agree completely.
Staying closeted, for whatever reason, whether you want to protect your privacy, or keep your private life private, or however you phrase it, still smacks of a little self-loathing and shame to me.
Plus, the more people that come out, the more people will come to realize that being gay isn't so different from being straight.
Except for that whole fabulousness part. 


Larry Kramer, on his 'problem' with the younger generation of gay men:

"I don't know why so many gay men don't want to know their history. I don't know why they turned their back on the older generation as if they don't want to have anything to do with them. I would like us to get beyond that....Sometimes when I go to schools, kids say that they're taught to be non-confrontational or non-participatory now, almost like it's not cool to have opinions and express them, which is sad. I hope we're coming out of all that." 

You can't ever know where you're going, if you don't know where you've been, and who fought for you to be right where you are.
We learn about the history of the world, the history of America, we need to know the history of gay people, and how they struggled and fought and lived and died so we could be here today. 


Kelly McGillis, on her public coming out:

"Fundamentally, I was just tired of lying about who I am. I've reached a point where my kids are grown, they're out of the house, they no longer have to be concerned that their friends, their friends’ families, will put them in compromising emotional situations because of my sexual preference. That was a big concern of mine because, unfortunately, a lot of people are not very tolerant. I got to a certain age and I didn’t give a s— anymore." 

This is the shame I was talking about. By staying closeted "for her kids" Kelly McGillis fed into that mythology that being gay is something scary or bad or different.
And do not get me started on her calling being gay her 'preference'.
Just proves that even gay people can say idiotic things.
Which proves we are more like straight people that many straight people think.
Except, again, for that whole fabulousness part. 


Rick Santorum, on denying gay rights, er, privileges:

"They have the right to be able to -- employment. I don't know what you mean by rights. What I'm talking about are privileges. Privileges of marriage, privileges of government benefits is a different thing than basic rights to live their lives as they well should and can as free Americans." 

So, Mister Frothy Mix, things we should be happy with less-than.
See, people like Santorum think of the LGBT community as a 'they,' and he believes that that 'they' shouldn't be treated like the rest of  'us'.
Think again you sanctimonious prig. 


Mel Gibson, on his bad image as a homophobe, anti-Semite, misogynist:

"I’ve never treated anyone badly or in a discriminatory way based on their gender, race, religion or sexuality -- period. I don’t blame some people for thinking that though, from the garbage they heard on those leaked tapes, which have been edited. You have to put it all in the proper context of being in an irrationally, heated discussion at the height of a breakdown, trying to get out of a really unhealthy relationship. It’s one terribly, awful moment in time, said to one person, in the span of one day and doesn’t represent what I truly believe or how I’ve treated people my entire life." 

Yeah, I know he's talking about his taped telephone rants, but, um, Melvin? You delusional fuck?
Do you not remember your anti-Semitic rant when you were arrested for being a boozehound?
Do you not remember calling a female office 'sugar tits'?
You can't rewrite history, jackass.
You're an anti-Semitic, misogynistic, homophobe.
Deal with it. 


GaGa, on calling herself a loser in her new HBO special:

"Well, in that moment I was very excited and nervous. That is a huge benchmark moment in my life. I'm 25 years old. I was asked to play Madison Square Garden. Sold out 5 nights and quite frankly it's very overwhelming. Do I feel like a loser sometimes? Yes, of course I do. We all feel like losers sometimes." 

Oh, yes, I'm sure when you have teams of minions carrying you around in an egg, or ask Cher to hold your meat purse, you feel like a loser.
And I'm sure when millions line up to see you in concert you feel like a dork.
Pity? Party of one. 


Tracy Morgan, on Charlie Sheen:

"Charlie Sheen ain't funny to me. I think that's a train wreck and I feel bad for his two little kids because they're the bodies being pulled out of the train wreck. What's going to happen to them? But everybody thinks it's a joke….While this a–hole is going on stage making a fool of himself his kids are going to suffer and don't even know it because this is a cycle of abuse." 

Tracy Morgan is kind of a nut-job, too.
So, when a nut-job calls you out for being crazy, maybe you ought to step away from the crack pipe, and the whores, and listen. 


Oklahoma's gun-totin', wingnut, homophobe, racist, Sally Kern, on banning affirmative action:

"We have a high percentage of blacks in prison and that’s tragic, but are they in prison just because they are black or because they don’t want to study as hard in school? I’ve taught school, and I saw a lot of people of color who didn’t study hard because they said the government would take care of them."

Wow.
She doesn't even try to hide the fact that she's a racist bitch.
Um, Sally, i know a lot of white folks who didn't study in school either, and I'm thinking you're probably one of them. 


Lawrence O'Donnell, on why he invited looney-tunes Birther, Orly Taitz, on his show, right before he kicked her off:

"She's crazy. I invited a crazy person on the show to see if a crazy person faced with the thing that the crazy person was trying to get for the two and a half years could say something responsive, something human to the document that was released today." 

Now, this falls under the category of "Told You So."
I like O'Donnell, but did he really think a wingnut lunatic like Taitz would ever cop to being wrong?
It's the new GOP model, You lie and when you get called out on your lie you just keep talking.
Palin, Gingrich, Bachmann, and Trump are all doing it.

I Ain't One To Gossip, But.....

Wow.
I mean, you know, if I saw a celebrity on the streets of Smallville, I'd whip out my trusty camera for a snapshot or two.

I mean, even if they were browsing through the antiques, or getting a soda at The Gate, I'd happily snap away.
But someone, and I ain't sayin' it was me, got a little too close to Jake Gyllenhaal when trying to photograph him.
Hell, they got a little too close to, um, Little Jake, too.
At the South by Southwest Film/Music festival this week, one fan got way too close for comfort to Jake Gyllenhaal. He actually took a picture of Jakey Gyllenhaal as he relieved himself, which made Jake all kinds of mad.
And scuffling mad, too.
When asked about the “rather heated scuffle in the theater bathroom last night" as a fan tried to take his picture, Jake laughed and said, “That’s true. I think it’s an appropriate space to keep privacy. I hope that people wouldn’t disagree with me on that.”
Jake’s rep says there was no scuffle, that Jake very politely asked me, er, the guy, to delete the picture from his camera, and I, um, he, did.
And, so while there is no photographic proof, yet, I will say this: "It's real, and it's spectacular."

Will male celebrities never learn?

Perhaps some of them, but not Ryan Phillippe, who will be ALLEGEDLY adding to his brood of two kids because his ex-girlfriend, whom he dated for all of a hot minute, is ALLEGEDLY got a bun in the oven.
According to PEOPLE--and they would know, wouldn't they--Phillippe's ex-girlfriend, actress Alexis Knapp, is pregnant and in her second trimester.
The couple dated on-and-off for a few months last year, and now there'll always be a reminder of the good times.
I usually get a souvenir to remind me of special times, not a baby.
But, that's just me.

Color me shocked.

I mean, I always thought you go on a TV show for six or eight weeks, date twenty or thirty people, have sex with five or so, then declare your love for two just as you propose to The One.
I mean, doesn't it work like that in real life?
It seems that mere moments after The Bachelor, Brad Womack, proposed to Emily Maynard on this weeks episode, millions of fans--hold up.....millions of fans? Really--were shocked to learn that the couple have already gone through a breakup.
Brad had declared that after being the Bachelor once and picking no one, that this time he was ready to settle down and date, marry, and impregnate a young woman on TV.
Now, it seems the dream has died.


Poor Babs.

One of her dreams was to star in a movie version, albeit another movie version, of Gypsy, that Broadway classic about show business and the quintessential stage mother.
That dream like the dream of Brad and Emily, has also died.
It seems that Gypsy playwright Arthur Laurents, along with co-creator Stephen Sondheim, have scrapped the entire project, leaving Babs heartbroken.
Laurents holds the rights to the 1959 Broadway musical and agreed that Barbra could play the role of Mama Rose, even telling the New York Post: "Barbra ... knows what she's doing. She has my approval." But now the 93-year-old Laurents has changed his mind after he spoke with the musical's lyricist Stephen Sondheim.
Sondheim ALLEGEDLY asked Laurents: "What is the point of" doing another movie. And now Laurents has said, "I don't want it now. I want it to stay alive. I think (Streisand) is disappointed. She wanted very much to do it. That would have been a good exit for her career. Tom Hooper wanted to direct it. I think he's wonderful."
All those wonderful people out of a job.
But Babs isn't said to be upset by the decision. She has ALLEGEDLY told friends that all she has to do is 'wait it out,' meaning that if Laurents were to die, she could buy the rights and do the film anyway.
Wow, waiting for someone to die just to get a job.
She should'a been Vice President.


There's a new show on NBC called The Voice, where they will take young unknowns, allow them to audition before four judges, then let them sing onstage in front of millions of people, who will vote for them, and make one of them the next American Ido....superstar.

Sounds like another show, eh?
Well, it isn't, so there!
This show has four judges, not three, and there called coaches, not judges. And The Voice producers say there show will be intent on building its contestants up, not “tearing them down” like some other competitions we know…"
Like, um, what?
The coaches for The Voice are Steven Tyler, er, I mean, Maroon 5‘s Adam Levine, Miss Jennifer Lopez, um, that would be Miss Christina Aguilera, Cee Lo Green and Blake Shelton; the host will be Ryan Seacrest-lite--if one could ever get lighter than Seacrest--Carson Daly.
See, it's nothing like American Idol.
In fact, it's so not AI that Christina Aguilera stopped mid-Cosmopolitan to say: “This isn’t about tearing people down. I want to bring these people up. The Voice really does stand for what it says. Instinctually, you can judge people based on the way they look. I love that fact we get to sit here with our backs turned away from these people and completely use just one sense to hear these voices. I’m not looking for vocal acrobatics, who has biggest range [of] high and low. I’m looking forward to getting moved.”
I'm looking forward to you getting help.


What won't people snort?
I mean, seriously. Coke, crack, comet, you name it. Rolling Stones guitarist Keith Richards even admitted to snorting his late father's ashes, and now it seems that burnt remains are becoming the nasal substance of choice.

Enter Courtney Love.
According to author Neil Strauss, author of 'Everybody Loves You When You're Dead: Journeys Into Fame And Madness', the Hole singer considered snorting the ashes of her late husband, Nirvana frontman Kurt Cobain.
Strauss said, "She walked to a dresser, pulled open a drawer, and removed a square-shaped tin," Strauss said. "She removed the lid, revealing a plastic bag full of white ashes" and said to him, "Too bad you don't do coke. Otherwise I'd suggest taking a metal straw to it."
Strauss declined, because, well, snorting the ashes of a cremated rock star is not something one does every day, unless you're Courtney Love.
Or maybe Keith Richards.

You know, just yesterday I printed a quote by Jodie Foster, where she gushes with love about alcoholic-misogynist-anti-Semite-homophobic-girlfriend-batterer Mel Gibson.

Odd, then, that Melvin was conspicuously absent from the South by Southwest Film Festival premiere of the film he made with Foster, The Beaver. Now, it's true, he was a little tied up in LA pleading No Contest to hitting his girlfriend while she held their child, but still......
And though Jodie was singing his praises on the red carpet, it is ALLEGED that it was her idea to keep Gibson away from the film festival showing of their movie.
A source--and by source, I mean any one of Jodie's traveling lesbian entourage--says, "Having him attend was just going to be too big of a risk. He could have gotten booed on the red carpet before the film even began. Everyone including Jodie decided it would be better if Mel didn't attend."
it would be better if Gibson went to prison.

I Ain't One To Gossip, But.....

Well, at least we now know they're really good actors.
All sorts of stories breaking that young and hip first-time Oscar hosts, Anne Hathaway and James Franco grew to hate one another as the show drew closer.

A source--and by source, I mean the guy that taped Hathaway's lips into a permanent smile and kept Franco in Fritos--says Anne was ready to cut a bitch, a certain stoner bitch, because of his lackadaisical performance on the show.
Franco, who, for the most part, seemed keen on just grinning like a fool while onstage, even skipped his own after party, at LA's The Writer's Room, and flew back to New York because he was so pissed off at perky, The Sun'll Come Out Tomorrow, Annie.
Now, Franco's rep says the whole thing is a lie, and, miraculously enough, Anne's rep said the same thing.
But if you watched the show, you saw Anne doing all the smiling and laughing and joking, the singing and the dancing, while Franco seemed to be in search of his next bong hit.
Had the academy bothered to ask me, I'd have told them to keep away from the Cheerleader and The Stoner as hosts.
Just sayin'.

Boy, Mike Huckabee has had a busy week.
First, he implied that the president is from Kenya, and that he grew up in Kenya, which we all know--unless you're a Teabagger with one tooth and one brain cell--isn't true.

Then Huckleberry Hound intimated that the president is a Muslim, again pandering to his base of toothless and brain-dead Teabaggers.
But now he's gone too far.
Too.Far. I tell ya!
This week presidential wannabe--and that will never happen--Mike Huckabee criticized Oscar-wining actress Natalie Portman for glorifying and glamorizing out-of-wedlock pregnancy.
Y'all remember how Natalie said during her Oscar acceptance speech: "Do it girls, fuck a guy and get knocked up but don't get married. It's fun!"
Oh, wait, that didn't happen, But it didn't stop Huckleberry Hounddog Face from going on 'The Michael Medved Show' the after Portman won the Oscar, and criticize her because she's expecting her first child with fiancé Benjamin Millepied.
Huckabee said: "People see a Natalie Portman who boasts, 'We're not married but we're having these children and they're doing just fine.' I think it gives a distorted image. It's unfortunate that we glorify and glamorize the idea of out-of-wedlock children."
Hmm, I didn't see glory and glamorization, I saw a woman in love, and glowing.
But then Huckleberry goes on to call Portman's pregnancy "troubling," saying that many single parents do not have the resources that the 29-year-old actress possessed and would not be able to afford help to look after the baby.
Um, okay Mike, you dingbat, um, where was all your holier-than-thou crap after Bristol Palin got knocked up and was trotted out on the campaign trail by her media whoring mother?
Oh, I forgot, it's perfectly fine when the GOP gets pregnant without benefit of marriage, or cheats on their wives, or gets drunk and rives, but not anybody else.
Go back to your hovel in the mountains Huckleberry. You are too out of touch to be president of anything more than the Backwoods Illiterates Club.
Just sayin'.

Lindsay Lohan has stopped getting high and stealing things that don't belong to her long enough to give an interview!
Can I get a Hallelujah up in here!

And apparently, when compared to Charlie Sheen, she comes off as lucid and normal.
Well, that's not such a stretch. The old lady who lives in the sewer drain on Broad Street in downtown Smallvile, and speaks in tongues, sounds more lucid than Charlie.
Anyway, speaking to Extra, Lindsay seemed clear-headed when talking about her career as an international drug addict and jewel thief, I mean, being a wacktress, i mean being an actress.
Lohan: "I feel great. As long as I'm focusing on the one thing that I know I need to put forth in my life, which is you know, my recovery and stuff. Then I'm doing good and that's most important for me."
The one thing she knows? How to get an array of doctors to provide her with prescription drugs so she can stop shopping in South Central? Or that one thing about how to distract a salesgirl while she slips some jewels into her bag?
Oh. Acting. I'd forgotten she was an actress.
Lohan says she also knows that it will take time to regain the trust of the film industry after her latest run-in with cops and lawyers and judges, oh my. And, it may take even longer to be trusted again, as she is in very serious danger of going to jail on felony charges from stealing that necklace.
She has until March 10 to decide if she wants to take a plea deal--which will include jail time--or go to trial--and risk being sent to jail.
Lohan: "There's gonna be a lot of steps [sidenote: I'm thinking at least Twelve Steps] that I have to go through to kind of prove myself again and get the trust from the people that I respect to work with. But I'm to do what I have to do to get there, because that's my passion."
I hope so Lindsay, because for the past few years your passion has been drugs, drink driving, arrest, rehab, arrest,jail, rehab, drunk driving, arrest, rehab, jewel theft, arrest.
Just sayin'.

I fear for Christina.
I'm hoping that she isn't on the rod to a Britney Meltdown,
I mean, there was the Star Mangled Banner mishap at the Superbowl; then she had the fall at the Grammys after opening the show. And now this.

Christina Aguilera and her boyfriend Matt Rutler were arrested this week in West Hollywood. Christina was booked on a misdemeanor charge for public intoxication, while Rutler also faces a misdemeanor charge for driving under the influence.
Reports have been swirling that Christina has been the hard party girl of the moment, and now it seems to be catching up to her.
i mean, I hope she doesn't attack a car with an umbrella and then shave off all her hair. I'm hoping she doesn't open the VMAs this year, singing from a comatose state. I'm hoping she gets better and gets back to singing.
Sidenote: Remember when  all those girl singers appeared on the scene at the same time? Britney, Christina, and Pink? Didn't you always think it'd be Pink who would be the one in trouble? Who knew Pink would turn out to be the Good Girl?
Just syainm'.

I'm guessing that, in the Cruise household, there is a list on the refrigerator of amounts to sue for when the tabloids write something unkind.
I'm thinking the list goes something like this:
Rumors of Tommy being a ginormous flaming queen....sue for $100 million.

Rumors of Katie being a ginormous drug addict....sue for $50 million.
Apparently, being a drug addict is more acceptable than being a giant 'mo.
Katie Holmes has filed a libel lawsuit seeking $50 million in damages from Star magazine after the weekly published a cover story that insinuated she is a drug addict.
Katie Holmes said, after getting permission from Tommy Grrrl to speak: "Of all the fabricated stories that continue to be published about me, this instance is beyond the pale. The publisher knew this outrageous story was false and printed it anyway to sell magazines."
The cover photo shows Holmes looking tired and upset--probably because she had to feed, bathe and clothe Suri and Tommy on the same day--with the tagline: "Addiction Nightmare: Katie Drug Shocker! The real reason she can't leave Tom."
Inside the issue, however, the article doesn't say that Katie is a drug addict, but focuses on her usage of something called an "e-meter" during Scientology sessions; e-meters, flown in directly from Xenu HQ, ALLEGEDLY reflect past emotional experiences.
Holmes says she was forced to file this lawsuit "to vindicate her reputation after American Media refused to retract its vicious lies about her....[the] claims about Katie are untrue, unethical and unlawful. Not only do they cruelly defame Katie, they play a cheap trick on the public, making ridiculously false claims on the cover unsupported by anything inside. Someone should bring a class action to get all buyers their money back."
Star is standing by their story: "We have not been served with any papers yet, however Star fully stands behind the editorial integrity of what we have published concerning Ms. Holmes' controversial use of the Scientology e-meter. The physical effect of the e-meter on its users is a matter of significant public concern, and we plan to vigorously defend the suit filed by Ms. Holmes."
Too bad no one is accusing the pair of being gay drug addicts.
I imagine that would be a $150 million lawsuit.
Just sayin'.

Joan Collins, who made her first appearance onstage for William Shakespeare, was rushed to the hospital from an Oscar after-party last weekend after she passed out.
Was it the fact that she's four-hundred-years old?

No, Collins revealed that her very tight dress was the reason she was hospitalized.
The 'Dynasty' actress, and former courtesan to Henry VIII, was ALLEGEDLY wearing a purple, figure-hugging dress by designer Georges Hobeika at Graydon Carter's Oscar viewing party and dinner when she started to feel faint.
Collins went and rested on a sofa at the hotel's bar, while her fifth husband Percy Gibson--who was born when Joan was married to her second husband, which means her eighth husband is being born now--called for an ambulance. Collins was discreetly helped out of the back of the hotel.
Joan Collins: "The truth was, I made the wrong decision to wear a very tight dress, and had something rather like a Victorian swoon." I believe, and correct me if I'm wrong, Joan Collins invented the Victorian swoon during the Victorian Era.
Now, that picture there, of the centuries old Collins, is one of her in the dress. Doesn't look too snug to me. But maybe it was the corset she borrowed from Marie Antoinette.
Just sayin'.

It looks like the drug addict don't fall far from the tree.
Whitney Houston's daughter, Bobbi Kristina Brown, has fired back at a National Enquirer cover story ALLEGING 17-year-old Brown was snorting cocaine at a party. She turns 18 on Friday.

The Enquirer photo spread shows Bobbi Kristina snorting a white substance, and we know it ain't crack, because crack is wack, like Mama says.
Bobbi Kristina made her case via Twitter, saying, "a former very dear person to me did this. Set me up to make it look exactly what it looks like. God will smite them yes..But it's really not what it looks like.. People will do anything for money which is extremely sad, and I'm very hurt by this."
Um, okay, so it isn't what it looks like, but, um, what is it, because we all know what it looks like.
See, according to the Enquirer--and remember, they broke the John Edwards adultery story so they must be a reputable source--quotes Bobbi Kristina's ex-boyfriend as saying, "Krissi is addicted to cocaine. I've tried to stop her, but all she said was, 'I'm just like my mother!'"
Bobbi Kristina, again on Twitter: "Thing's people do these days to hurt others is a shame. All I can do now, is keep my head up high, keep looking towards the lord.All the lord is telling me is be still. That's all, and that's exactly what I'm going to do."
Hmm, didn't her Mama say the same sorts of things when people said she had a drug problem, which she denied and denied and denied, until she admitted it was true?
Bobbi Kristina: "I love my family so much. My mom just comforted me to the max, and I'm so thankful for her. Thank you so much lord for blessing me with an Phenomenal family and incredibly phenomenal mother. Thank you for giving me the strength to move forward and put things in the past."
Hopefully this isn't true, but, well, it all sounds so vaguely familiar. I'm hoping Bobbi Kristina doesn't do a sit-down with Diane Sawyer.
And, to be fair, the National Enquirer has printed some very interesting Bobbi Kristina stories over the years. In 2008, they reported that a then-15 Bobbi Kristina "tried to stab her mom during an argument--and then attempted to kill herself by slashing her wrists," and in 2010, the Enquirer said Bobbi Kristina  was an "out of control....wild child....going party party-crazy."
And, continuing to be fair, in 2007, Whitney herself prohibited her then 14-year-old daughter from MySpace after photos of Bobbi Kristina ALLEGEDLY drinking alcohol and smoking weed surfaced.
Where there's smoke, there's probably a crack pipe.
Just sayin'.

Some people--not me--think Valentine's Day is the most romantic day of the year.
I'm guessing that this past Valentine's Day wasn't that good for Paula Abdul.

The former host of American idol, and the recently cancelled Live to Dance, placed a call to 911 on Valentine's Day while she was riding in a car with her boyfriend.
Crying, she told the operator of her emergency: "I wanna go, and he won't let me!"
And then she was heard, on tapes that TMZ acquired, asking her boyfriend, "Are you gonna drop me off 'cause I have emergency on the phone?"
Soon, thank god, the situation was diffused, and Paula happily sang, using Auto-Tone, "He's dropping me off."
Crisis averted!
Later on, when police spoke to Abdul, she claimed that the earlier incident was a minor argument that never became physical, and she declined to file a police report.
Luckily for Paula, the 911 operators in LA have nothing better to do than,listen to wannabe celebrities and hasbeens comp[lain about not getting their way.
Just sayin'.